I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
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