i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize