I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
My ATM looks so different sober.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize