Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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