I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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