I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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