i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
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You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
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just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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