someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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