if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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