I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
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I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize