Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
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My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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