so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
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