My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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