there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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