Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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