her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's blow job season.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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