Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"

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(516): I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!" http://tfl.nu/g6w4

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(903): View more from Texas

I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer

(214): View more from Texas

... I'm KD

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(903): I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer (214): ... I'm KD http://tfl.nu/mzja

Replies (38) Good night (510) Bad night (2144)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

My Vagina smells like Nemo again.

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(651): My Vagina smells like Nemo again. http://tfl.nu/j13v

Replies (29) Good night (477) Bad night (5115) Order T-Shirt
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.

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(215): you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'. (215): we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk. http://tfl.nu/6wc5

Replies (27) Good night (6550) Bad night (672)
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(216): View more from Ohio

I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.

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(216): I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance. http://tfl.nu/bz9b

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"

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(570): as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing" http://tfl.nu/9hoo

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(630): View more from Illinois

He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.

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(630): He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together. http://tfl.nu/tn1p

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..

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(814): that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before.. http://tfl.nu/lsu6

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(703): View more from Virginia

When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.

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(703): When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship. http://tfl.nu/12c3

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(910): View more from North Carolina

I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.

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(910): I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating. http://tfl.nu/3b9t

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(520): View more from Arizona

I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"

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(520): I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito" http://tfl.nu/vbc5

Replies (8) Good night (944) Bad night (472)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

the evidence from last night is not good...

(904): View more from Florida

what evidence?

(843): View more from South Carolina

my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...

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(843): the evidence from last night is not good... (904): what evidence? (843): my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair... http://tfl.nu/ykqm

Replies (3) Good night (1032) Bad night (433)
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(530): View more from California

No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth

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(530): No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth http://tfl.nu/uojr

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.

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(715): She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird. http://tfl.nu/gla6

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...

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(615): Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers... http://tfl.nu/ugq8

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