I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was an excessively violent trivia night
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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