her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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