Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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