I'm lost and stupid without you.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Randomize