So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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