I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
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