Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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