Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize