When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
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he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
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but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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