remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
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he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
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My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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