you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Your mouth is God's brothel.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize