There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize