I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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