Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
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