i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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