I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
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sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
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Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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