We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize