i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize