sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
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