I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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