Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
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