And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
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