she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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