Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize