How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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