Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
sex in a hospital.. check
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize