yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
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I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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