Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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