once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
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I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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