we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize