In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
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Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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