Apparently you make a good broom.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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