whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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